Currently Listening Lafcadio By As Tall as Lions see related

the entirety of this journal has been me trying to figure us out, since i first got here. we broke up and came to college, and i thought we'd rebuild for good in a new town, on our own. you and me. now it is me who is left, and sometimes the regret can tear at me til i am on my knees. i'll learn to hold myself up for you. but please.

don't learn to forget me. you've got her now, but i've got news for you. i know what i want. if you ever want it again, i want to give it to you.

i won't fail you again. this page has no more reason to exist. i've conquered my feelings, too late. don't worry. you will find me somewhere else.
all my love, h.

you took   her  on a date tonight and i haven't heard from you
since.

stop breaking me.

i can't write pretty things anymore. i don't know what's happened to me. i want to be pretty, i want to. i feel so young inside and so old outside. you give me a lump in my throat and it isn't fair because it is all my fault in the end. outside i can hear police sirens, it always makes me want to cry because i know that something bad is happening to someone. it is almost six in the morning and i can't finish my paper because i feel shaky and sad and stuck. i feel like my joints are jello inside of my body, i feel like a movie that doesn't end happily. why don't you love me the same anymore?

you give me your sweatshirt as
meteors fall around us but not really
because they are light years away
according to science, you tell me
i hate science but when you talk about it sometimes
i don't hate it as much
i'm glad it's cold because you want me closer now that you don't have your sweatshirt on

you've changed i think, i think i want to trust you
you've only just come back
after two summers of love and hate and i already want more
than i can allow myself

i guess i forgot that i missed you